I hate this video:
I’ve seen it go by 4 times so far on my facebook newsfeed, knowing full well that it will blow up tomorrow and through the next week, with all sorts of #loveyoumom #bestmomintheworld TAG mom, #LOVEYOU.
But let’s pause a second. What mother is actually required to do ALL of these things listed? I fully understand that there are a lot of single mamas out there, and they have a lot of weight on their shoulders, I mean no disrespect there. They do have a lot of these responsibilities solely on themselves (though I’ll also argue they get support from grandparents and sometimes others)
But my thought is that the women in my feed who are patting themselves on their backs, should look around and gain some perspective. All have supportive spouses, who I can imagine take on at least some of these duties.
Parenting is tough, I don’t have to be a parent (yet) to know that, but you know what? When you see those double lines you know you’re in for a ride, you’ve signed up for this shit (most of the time, and I mean literally, there is a lot of literal shit to deal with when you’re a parent), and you know from the get-go that you are now responsible for this alien creature growing inside you, and you’re pretty much responsible for it for the rest of your life.
To call it the World’s Toughest Job? I don’t know. I think there’s tougher ones out there, (Actually I made a couple of shows about it: http://www.amazon.com/Endurance-HD/dp/B0085AE8DW) and by making moms into martyrs we’re not doing women or men who choose to go the parenting route any favors. Parenting is not a job, it’s a long term decision one makes in life, it’s a change in lifestyle and PART of the lives of those who chose to take it on. Some do it terribly, some do many of the things listed in this ad, but I think it’s very rare to find a woman (or man) who fits this “job description” seen in the video perfectly.
Videos like this continue the downward spiral of women being pigeon-holed into this “perfect-mom” role that’s unobtainable. And to that I say, fuck off.
One of our to-do items over the weekend was to start looking into baby schools/ infant care to start getting on waitlists in the city (This is my life now?). Being the natural researcher I am, I wanted to look up the head of a school that’s very close to our house.
I found a craigslist ad that listed that the daycare was looking for teachers. The salary listed was $11.50-$13.50 which legitimately shocked me. In a state looking to raise minimum wage to $15 a hour (which I 100% support) I cannot BELIVE that people I’m to trust my infant with make that little. The school I was looking at wasn’t a chain, so I decided to looking into Bright Horizons, and start looking for salary info for their teachers, glassdoor.com states that they’re just under $14 an hour. WHAT?! This is outrageous. I know daycare isn’t cheap, and a lot of these places come with nice benefits for the teachers, but it just seems like they’re not being paid enough.
It’s going to be hard to decide what to do when/if I’m ready to go back to work.
I’m starting to wonder why I ever left tumblr to go self hosted. I mean I like the freedom there, especially since the design of my actual tumblr page is ancient and I didn’t love the free themes I chose from at the time, but the ease of just writing and adding photos here is a much nicer and easier process.
Anywho. I’m now 18 weeks pregnant. WOAH. the belly has officially popped:
I went to a going away party for a photographer on Saturday, the theme was glamour so I went all out. Since nothing fits anymore (both due to my shoulders hulking out of some of my older dresses and now, the belly) I went the Rent the Runway route and I was pleased. This was tighter than I thought it would be, but it worked. John said my “sorority girl pose” makes it look smaller than it is, it is definitely noticeable. A gold disco ball happening there, but I had to embrace it. (FYI they make spanx for pregnant people, they are insanely hilarious, I will really need them for a wedding in June).
Which brings me to a brand new thing, maternity shopping. I had a total freakout moment when entering village maternity and became overwhelmed with the idea of how big I’m going to grow, and then there was some sticker shock. I walked out with a “tummy sleeve” thing so I can wear my jeans a little longer and the spanx. That’s about as far as I could give into, my MIL suggested online shopping so I haven’t actually made the order but this is what’s in my shopping cart:
Cheap H&M maternity. I can feel okay about this, especially if I order it and don’t have to wear it for a little bit longer.
In working out news, still haven’t run much more than from the gym to my front door (about half a block) but I have been doing some crossfit. Found out that regular push-ups are out, I feel like a teeter totter! I didn’t do 14.5 for fear of killing myself and the baby on the burpees and the 65LB bar felt awful on a few practice reps. I know there are other women who are much more pregnant than me who did this workout or who modified it, and to them I say, cool, nice work, I’m good chilling out over here eating pizza.
I did have a total tantrum last night over crossfit though. Today they’re doing one of my favorite WODs, Annie ( 50-40-30-20-10 double unders and sit-ups). After doing a bunch of med ball situps on Saturday and feeling like maybe they’re not the very best thing for my growing fetus, I knew I had to sit out of this one. The thing is, I’m on the board for this benchmark workout and I’m SURE that my time will get knocked off today! Which makes me mad, and sad and wanting to make sure I reclaim my title when I’m not pregnant, but that feels like a million years from now. WAH. I know, miracle of life and all that, but I hate having to limit myself. Also, I know that this is the least of the compromises I’ll have to be making, but one of the first, so I’m complaining about it.
In progress news: We’re cleaning stuff out of the house, we got rid of 6 bags of clothing and some bedding we don’t need. Next stop is my wedding dress, getting rid of the guest room bed and thinking about getting some new furniture. I want to see how the anatomy scan goes in 2 weeks before buying anything big, we’re going relatively unisex for the room (robots) but it will be nice to add feminine or male tones to it once we know the sex.
PS- just found out that the WOD on the website was an April Fool’s! They ended up doing “Annie on Steroids” 50-40-30-20-10, double unders, V-Ups and run 800m in between each round, so my place on the board is safe… for now!
It is weird to have something that will eventually be a person growing inside you.
I’m starting to really feel it move now, it did a flip or something earlier and it totally creeped me out. Pregnancy is gross, there I said it.
In other related news, I’m working my tail off and so.damn.tired. I’m still not showing a ton which I like, but I have started complaining more out loud about little things which negates the whole, “I’m going to go on like nothing is changing until I’m really showing.”
I’ve started a couple of pinterest boards to start planning for stuff that I’ll want/need, but man, there are so many options for everything out there.
My boxmates, who I complain to the most because I get irrationally angry about having to scale (but I do it anyway because I’m not stupid), are being awesome. They got me this adorable shirt
We find out the sex of the baby in two or three weeks (I still need to make that appointment, been so busy I haven’t made the call yet!) We’re excited about that, it will be fun to know and start narrowing down names.
I’m in SF for work right now and it’s nice to be in a warm climate, I’m LOVING the course I’m producing right now, it’s about body language and the instructor is awesome and the crew is great. However, I can’t wait to go back home to Seattle and be with the hubbo, we’ve gotten very used to living in the same house all the time and so when either of us have to travel it throws the one left at home into a load of responsibility that we normally share.
I’ve got 6 weeks until the BMO half marathon and besides an occasional 4 mile run every other Sunday, and 2-3 crossfit workouts a week, I haven’t been training. Yikes. My only goal is sub 2, but I better get a 8 or 10 miler in at least once leading up to this sucker.
Oh and I’ll be rowing in a canoe with John for Ski to Sea this year, which is in late May, so I’m going to start focusing on shoulder work in PT along with my squat therapy. Should be good, I hope we do well, I’m bummed that I won’t be running it, but it would be stupid to run 8 miles down a mountain when I’m 6.5 months pregnant.
1) I find it interesting that I find the most privacy or space to feel like I can just WRITE on Tumblr. I have a few friends here who I read all the time (who I really like and don’t mind sharing with), but almost none are IRL friends (or friends that have known me for a long time) None of my longtime close friends (that I know of!) know about my space here, which I kind of like.
2) This makes it easier for me to post about things here that for whatever reason I won’t post on my self-hosted blog. I’ve been neglecting that blog so I can attempt to get some video projects done in between work hours, but being tired all the time doesn’t make that easy. Also, that blog takes more of my effort and I have perfectionist problems because I feel like it’s a big representation of ME.
3) This leads me to my mini rant.
Ahh crossfit open, things are getting interesting this early, huh? I was thinking this might be a wallball burpee something or other. Overhead Squats? That’s rough on me. Chest to Bar Pull-ups? I can do them but they will take awhile.
I’ve been in physical therapy for the last 7 weeks attempting to improve my air squat, there’s been progress, but it’s been slow. Throw 65lbs over my head? Ay yai yai!
My strategy will be to have a wide stance, do my best to get more than one rep without having to put the bar down. Then get to the pull up bar, go with a reverse grip (a chin-up grip) and try to make every rep count.
My realistic goal is to get 1 round total. I’ll be attempting the WOD on Sunday, just one go at it, I refuse to do these workouts more than once. For me, there is no point in adding extra pressure to get a better score. If I get one rep for every WOD this year I’ll be happy. By time the Open is over I will be 18 weeks pregnant, and damn proud of myself for just participating.